Wow--- I left Cincinnati on Sunday morning at 3:27a.m- leaving in love, leaving without ripples-just leaving- no running from or to- feeling strongly this is the next step.
Honoring the message to take a train- the adventure of that- I step onto the train with 2 suitcases, my purse and computer carrier- leaving a big suitcase behind at my dear friend's with clothes- not worrying about getting them back or needing them- just taking the next step. On my own- no help-how empowering!
I packed a lunch for myself knowing I would not enjoy the food provided on the train- apples, turkey sandwich, almonds, chocolate. Taking care of myself. How empowering!
As I sat on the train and got used to the vibration- at times I felt I was being held and rocked to sleep; at times I felt I was being shaken; waking up to surprises of seeing a large, powerful hawk sitting on a pole as we went by- witnessing a group of white goats gathered around a burned out area- a butterfly garden-the green mountains and rushing waters of West Virginian- the lush rolling, green farms of Virginia-the excitement and energy of Washington D.C- the sweetness and quaintness of the small towns around Washington D.C.-the emptiness and decay of Baltimore- the high vibe of Philadelphia. Thrilled and excited at it all- knowing where I was without asking, just knowing- how empowering!
I have been experiencing a pain in my left side for a few weeks- not constant- but present at times- I felt it on the train and felt the stuckness of something...breathing into the shaken energy and allowing the energy to get unstuck- the pain is gone! How empowering! Healing mySelf!
The people I met, I met totally in the present with no needs, just the adventure of a connection. I first sat next to a young man who was traveling to Kentucky to be with his child- leaving a high paying job behind with no promise of the future; then I sat next to a young man from Washington D.C who was returning from college for summer break- we spoke about seeing things through the eyes of children; as we pulled into D.C., I shared some of my knowledge of the Masons and the creation of the city- feeling him begin to see the sights he took for granted with new eyes; across the way from me from Cincinnati was a woman who showed kindness to me and I to her the whole trip- as we pulled out of one station, she came back from the bathroom having changed clothes- she was super- nun! We joked about it and she shared that she lives with an elderly nun who doesn't like it when the women go out in public without their habits- and she wanted to be comfortable for the more than 10 hour train ride! And then next to her was a young man who was helpful and friendly on the trip and on the last hour got involved with a conversation with his lady friend he was going to see- witnessing anger and hatred and victimhood; loving that part of me and then playing some of the music I brought with me and chanting! I felt no need to shift, change or desire anything else but the connections I had with these people and loving the mirror they are- I am enjoying this new way of Being! How empowering!
I enjoyed watching my nervousness come up as we pulled into the train station in Philadelphia- not knowing what this part of the trip would bring. A new experience and not sure of the outcome- asking for directions and help and getting less than satisfactory answers- choosing to sit down and breath and realizing yes I would have to spend the night in the station- watching the thoughts and stories come up and leave. I felt uncomfortable and I felt some excitement about the adventure. I witnessed the Amtrak people with no desire to help or change what I was seeing- the young man who just talked and gave the wrong information; the man who tried to tell the woman who didn't speak any English to purchase a ticket- she actually came to me for help and I helped her by being firm with their need to help her; the way another young woman who had asked for help and was told the wrong thing came to realize this and shared her anger loudly. I chose to keep asking the questions over and over and explore myself so that I was able to smoothly leave the station at 5:25 Monday morning! How empowering!
I attempted to sleep in the bright, loud station and actually found myself in a full journey- hearing the noise and seeing the lights multidimensionally- smiling and laughing. I was roused by the police at one point and asked if I had a ticket- not wanting "homeless" people to hang out in the station- hahahahaha- joke is on them! I am homeless. And I enjoyed seeing the people there who slipped under the radar, who were homeless- sending them waves of love and encouragement! I propped myself up at one point, watching old episodes of Grey's Anatomy on the computer for enjoyment- how empowering! I felt the significance of this journey for all of us- ti wash;t just about me....
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