Flock of Freedom: Owning it all

Flock of Freedom: Owning it all: What a few weeks!!!! I met this most amazing woman in a magical way who is a Buddhist nun- we had an immediate connection- she c...

Owning it all

What a few weeks!!!!

I met this most amazing woman in a magical way who is a Buddhist nun- we had an immediate connection- she crying because I reminded her of someone and I because she shared her vision of a new monastic order and a community vision- Community is what I have been experiencing and embodying over the last few years and it always feels wonderful to meet another who isn't attached to a certain model and is willing to explore in a powerful, sovereign way..

And as it always seems to transpire I got to step up against a growing edge as we talked; when I was told by my new friend that I am as close to a nun as she has met, I was thrown for a loop; wow I had always thought of myself as a natural, sensual woman and yes I have lived a simple life as far as stuff and intimate relationship over the last few years; so why was I so upset over being called a nun?  The first reaction has to do with the history of being taught by nuns my whole life ( that got let go quickly) and the other piece I got was that once again,  I was looking to someone else for definitions and knowledge- after many days of sitting with this statement, I fully accept my ‘nunhood”- the me that has made my relationship with God and the Divine as the most important thing in my life- above intimate relationship with a man/woman/things.  So no I have not taken strict vows and don’t intend to- because for me that feels too rigid- this is what I am :

I am conscious relationship

I am simplicity

I am compassionate service

I am sovereign

I am God

I am present

I am a carer and I am Self care

I am an invitation to play in this new way

I am a reconnection to the earth, other people and the rest of the universe

I am clarity

I am an opening to what’s next

I am abundance and richness

I am owning and loving all parts of me

I am love

I am free

As I accept who I am, I can now begin to see the threads of what is coming together:

As I accept I am a carer and look at how I do that- in all of the other vibrations, I can see others who want to play can join this community and we can serve together- we can be carers of the women who think they are dying- physically, mentally, spiritually and emotionally.  We can provide service with presence and love and receive cash, housing, food- we receive exactly what we require.  We provide service in a way that aligns with everyone being whole and complete- everyone getting what he or she needs.

I accept and see the thread of the group called Circles that the nun invited me to join- small group work-witnessing and supporting people who are desiring to leave behind poverty and what that all means...

I accept the feel of all I have to do is be out with as many people as possible- I carry the monastic order and am creating community as I walk about Being all the things that I am discovering.  I feel that as I attend social events and look for work.

I accept the gift of being able to stay in the house where I cared for the woman I was employed by as a landing of inviting people in- my friend to cook for; others to spend the night when they don't have a place to stay- this is the landing of the physical of what I have seen and desired.

I accept community that is forming as there has been a few nights of meditation here at the house while I have been here alone; the other night I saw such beautiful amazing lights- asking and hearing the message at the same time- important for you to see and remember the real beauty.  Then I saw Donna ( the woman I cared for)  and my mother- such a warm bright light formed all around us like we sitting in the middle of a flame…  Feeling so protected and held- remember this one dear one…  Bright yellow diamond light- all around…  I said out loud- We are so cared for!

During the meditation, I ended up in the open space that a friend  had spoken of the other day ( the space of having let go of the old and on the other side is a blank space) and was asked what we should have it look like- what to experience?  First I chose no time and I brought that back in this experience and had some fun with that- things showing up suddenly like a lot of money that wasn’t there a minute ago- next was each Being really seeing each other- bringing that back into this experience and people were losing their minds,,,yeah! Running down the streets screaming. Then we decided to play with no form and when we brought that back to this experience to play with- guess what?  There was no hunger, no homelessness, none of the fears associated with these- as I write this I get the message of this – it is the experience of the illusion. Smile….

Wah and a song that played at the last retreat I was on- really listening to the words- all my love, I have gone so beyond; landing that I am God and my life is my ministry- then communicating with a friend on FB about the holiday and how grateful I am to witness her flight of freedom- she shared that I had helped model who to be with her kids when I cared for them and how helpful it is to see me live and enjoy the experience.

This all coming together in a single aligned instant of recognition- owning it all- I am!

Love,

Lynn

Flock of Freedom: Being

Flock of Freedom: Being: Again so enjoying the laying in bed- not sleeping- although allowing for the dosing off because of waking up early. This mornin...

Being

Again so enjoying the laying in bed- not sleeping- although allowing for the dosing off because of waking up early.  This morning I put on Ashana and I journeyed- meaning I went out into another realm- the realm of God- and I brought it all back in- back in to this experience in the body- feeling the drop of the tear as I listened to Opening to love- experiencing an opening not before experienced over a length of time- knowing it is always here.  Breathing on many levels as I listen to You are my Breath- surrendering as I listen to Only you in my heart and Deep Peace.

I am Home; I am Safe; I am here to be in service to the Divine within us all and as I am in service this day to the Divine within I am in service to all.

I lay in bed and enjoy the experience of blowing my nose and the flow of air that comes with that; I enjoy the numbness of the right arm and the tingling of awakening; I enjoy the languishing in the bed with the covers – I remember another time when the message was “it’s all about the poop”- meaning when I can poop or manage another’s poop with reverence and grace- the world has shifted and yes my world will have shifted!

So we shall see- I enjoy the grinding of the coffee beans the water coming out of the faucet and yes that is magic!  I am enjoying the first cup of coffee with cream- cream whipped lovingly the other night by the hands of a brother!  Perhaps before I complete this I will experience nirvana in the toilet!

I hear a knock (psychic knock) and know it is time to get out of bed- hearing strong message to stay in today and Be (that to me means to be present to it all-anything that shows up in the outer world and anything that shows up in the inner world)- knowing I will reschedule an appointment I have with another opening heart- the phone rings right as I get out of the bedroom and it is her wishing to reschedule as well- again what has been created is a deep connection with another who is living in her own creations and creating in harmony!

Now I am in deep bowing to the gift of the computer- the Internet- so quickly I can allow words to flow through; deep bowing to the magic of the fire that is coming through in the furnace on this slightly chilled morning.

I am in deep bow to the journey within today and the gift it will be to others as I show up differently- there are some tasks today and I can feel myself doing them with fun and joy and grace- cleaning the bathroom and changing the sheets for another guest in the house- as the family gathers to be with Donna on her body’s journey out of this world.  The packing of some belongings so I can move in next door for a bit- sweet offer of the neighbor and friend of Donna- she has also asked me to share a meal with her tonight- can feel the energetic gift this is to her as well!

I sit in quiet and reverence for other gifts to be allowed in today- all my dreams and visions are coming true!

With deep love and peace,

Lynn

Big energy!!!

One of the reasons I feel like the energy is so big right now that last night I had a headache for the first time in months- it was so intense that I actually took something for it- all I wanted to do was sleep and watch TV- so thank God it was Grey's Anatomy night!!!!

Feels like a significant day energy wise- the second day in a row of allowing the laying in bed and feeling and letting go and allowing it all.  I read last night that today was a day when we had total access to the Central Sun- when I felt that this morning it felt like total access to all parts of me- I felt strong, I felt all the possibilities, I felt like I was inviting people in, I felt like even though I could feel others in co-creation that I didn’t need them.  I read that today would be a great day to land all the dreams and wishes so I felt those differently than I have before- the difference was there was no need there was just this vibration of joy and welcoming:

·     I feel home being right here- meaning in me and I could feel the outer manifestation of home – me standing at the door inviting others in to eat, drink and be merry- no one else has to be there for this to be created- final letting go of this having to look like it is with one certain person or a certain neighborhood or a certain place.  This home is so rich and welcoming and loving- it is luxurious in that it holds.  Interesting enough this same space was felt the other night when I had friends over to Donna’s house- now that her being is not here my energy has filled all the space- as I write this I remember the space is where everything gets created.

·     I feel landing a space to call home and being out in the community as much as possible to touch as many as possible- I could feel small groups of play- dance, Latihan- all of this with no requirement as to the who or the what.

·     I feel related to all this the full support of cash, food- anything this Being requires to play in balance- with no attachment to how this shows up- there is a dear friend and sistar who has been supporting and witnessing me on this particular piece of the journey and I had shared with her that with whatever gets created I will share 10%- I felt the joy in writing her a big check for $10,000.  Don’t know the how- but the when is now!!!  In fact because I wrote this, I got up and wrote a check for $10,000.

·     Most nights I wake up and see lights flying all around me- this morning as I felt my breath inhaling all of me back in I saw the lights in me and around the body- especially the hands.

My desire is to do more work in small groups and today I am off to the small group I found here in Boulder- it is called Dreamweavers.  It is testimony to the power of small groups- my first visit I had a lot of judgment and stories around how I didn’t fit in- I know enough to ask to be shown what the judgment and stories are about and I saw everyone was mirroring for me the parts that I wasn’t accepting- being so arrogant about my walk and work.  I kept checking in and getting a yes to go back- with this group and my presence the energy created has allowed the opportunity for what’s next in living situation and work!!!  It has allowed for an opening with another member of the group to co-create dance here in Boulder; a Thanksgiving celebration and possible some other things.  It has allowed me to land Latihan here in Boulder with no attachment to my dear brother who I thought would co-create with me being there.  And all of this with no attachment to if it goes away tomorrow!

And so with no knowledge in the moment of what’s next with where I am to live or how I am to support myself, I relax into all is well right now in this moment!  I have a wonderful safe space to sleep and work, I have food and I have the group to go to today and bus fare to get there- more than anything , I have me..

With love to me and from me,

Lynn

New waves of I am

I was asked the other day by a dear friend for what purpose do I write- I write because when I do something opens up and I get even more information- more feeling about what is up in the moment.

For years I have read, heard many spiritual principles- for me what seems to be happening is the actual experience in the body, in the feelings, and actual manifestation and synchronicity in the outer world.

So today I woke up and had my experience and chose to sit and write first off- then I open up the Tut note and Rev Angela's note that I receive each morning- each one building on what I am experiencing- building the trust muscle even more!

On this very quiet, peaceful morning I lay in bed for a long time- feeling warm, safe- thinking a lot about last night and my reaction to the sexual talk and energy between two friends – I definitely had a charge and there was definitely some untapped, unmet need there- as I write this I accept this in me- I love this in me.  What I noticed this morning was a desire to go to back-ups- other Beings that I share a connection with to check things out- figure things out; and I loved and accepted that too.  Remembering and feeling and experiencing that all the answers are right here- I do not have to go anywhere else- writing this is allowing me to really feel this- this being that I am all of this- I am the untapped, unmet sexual energy; I am the reaction to it; I am how it played out between the two friends; I am the desire to check everything out with others; I am all the thoughts around this- and with this I have peace.  Thank you to all who are in service by just showing up and Being you; thank you to Me.  I can hold it all it appears.

What I also experienced as I continued to breathe deeply and relax into all of this is all that I am- feeling as many cells as I could lighting up- I am that; feeling home- I am that; feeling abundance and richness- I am that; feeling safe- I am that; feeling unsure of the how and the where- I am that; feeling the power of love- I am that; feeling Being in service- I am that; feeling vibrant health- I am that; feeling Being alone- I am that; feeling community and family- I am that- while I was feeling all of this looking back over the past few moments and seeing how quickly the I am are being seen in the physical world.

The asking of what’s next over the last few weeks and the letting go of what that may look like and the shifts that are occurring in the physical world.

I did read something somewhere last night that one of the experiences to be had is to feel the universe within; to feel the creation of universe- I am getting a sense of what that may feel like- it is a tingle and I allow for all my dreams and visions to come true- work that I enjoy; Being in service and living with the vibe tribe.

And I might add that I am so choosing the easy button on what’s next!  

Love to Us,

Lynn