Feels like a significant day energy wise- the second day in a row of allowing the laying in bed and feeling and letting go and allowing it all. I read last night that today was a day when we had total access to the Central Sun- when I felt that this morning it felt like total access to all parts of me- I felt strong, I felt all the possibilities, I felt like I was inviting people in, I felt like even though I could feel others in co-creation that I didn’t need them. I read that today would be a great day to land all the dreams and wishes so I felt those differently than I have before- the difference was there was no need there was just this vibration of joy and welcoming:
· I feel home being right here- meaning in me and I could feel the outer manifestation of home – me standing at the door inviting others in to eat, drink and be merry- no one else has to be there for this to be created- final letting go of this having to look like it is with one certain person or a certain neighborhood or a certain place. This home is so rich and welcoming and loving- it is luxurious in that it holds. Interesting enough this same space was felt the other night when I had friends over to Donna’s house- now that her being is not here my energy has filled all the space- as I write this I remember the space is where everything gets created.
· I feel landing a space to call home and being out in the community as much as possible to touch as many as possible- I could feel small groups of play- dance, Latihan- all of this with no requirement as to the who or the what.
· I feel related to all this the full support of cash, food- anything this Being requires to play in balance- with no attachment to how this shows up- there is a dear friend and sistar who has been supporting and witnessing me on this particular piece of the journey and I had shared with her that with whatever gets created I will share 10%- I felt the joy in writing her a big check for $10,000. Don’t know the how- but the when is now!!! In fact because I wrote this, I got up and wrote a check for $10,000.
· Most nights I wake up and see lights flying all around me- this morning as I felt my breath inhaling all of me back in I saw the lights in me and around the body- especially the hands.
My desire is to do more work in small groups and today I am off to the small group I found here in Boulder- it is called Dreamweavers. It is testimony to the power of small groups- my first visit I had a lot of judgment and stories around how I didn’t fit in- I know enough to ask to be shown what the judgment and stories are about and I saw everyone was mirroring for me the parts that I wasn’t accepting- being so arrogant about my walk and work. I kept checking in and getting a yes to go back- with this group and my presence the energy created has allowed the opportunity for what’s next in living situation and work!!! It has allowed for an opening with another member of the group to co-create dance here in Boulder; a Thanksgiving celebration and possible some other things. It has allowed me to land Latihan here in Boulder with no attachment to my dear brother who I thought would co-create with me being there. And all of this with no attachment to if it goes away tomorrow!
And so with no knowledge in the moment of what’s next with where I am to live or how I am to support myself, I relax into all is well right now in this moment! I have a wonderful safe space to sleep and work, I have food and I have the group to go to today and bus fare to get there- more than anything , I have me..
With love to me and from me,
Lynn
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