Well- what a day so far and it isn't even half over with! The theme of the morning has been parenting myself.
There is quite a bit of energy swirling what with sun magnetics and of course the internal energy of my anticipated move. Not to be gross, but I am experiencing swollen breast and very tender nipples- it was mentioned a few times yesterday as I shared with friends- like I was giving birth or mothering. As I lay in bed this morning, I asked my breasts what they had to say. I heard that it felt like I was leaving the two little boys I live with behind- my little girl with whom I had just integrated was worried, she was going to be left behind again. I felt that and saw a belief that if I leave everything ends and felt how that had served me in the past- thank you! And leaving physically doesn't mean everything ends. Sending love to my little girl.
I could also feel this new creation of service that is forming as a baby growing in me- desire to take care of myself during pregnancy and nurture myself- desire to breast feed the baby after it is born. Going to spend some time with this baby today.
And today during a conversation with Teacher and doing work around fear and how I experience fear another level revealed itself- it is up to me and I can do it- the it is to love myself enough that I call bull.... when my mind says I can't do this or I can't do that. It came up as we were working on some body practices to show me even when I don't think I am in fear, I am- my mind is wonderful at telling me I licked something. So it is now up to me to with love- say enough. I have been that and done that for others- children and adults alike- time to do it for myself.
And so today with no story I take for myself- to parent, to nurture, to love- I choose to meditate, to write, to connect with friends, to read, to be quiet, to play with the baby and to say bull.... when necessary!
Love,
Lynn
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